Clown News Letter
Issue
388
April 5, 2006
Spring
is in the air! So are tornados, snow, rain and flying debris. The spring storms
bring spectacular lightning displays, smell of crisp air and the needed water to
start the growing season. Storms can be destructive too. (Fantastic pics at http://www.extremeinstability.com/05-11-12.htm
of the F2-4 tornado in November of 2005 that ravaged towns very near me.)
Steve Kissell brings another convention to our
advertiser’s list. The Family Entertainer’s Workshop will be in Minneapolis, MN.
What a great city! It has to be great, that’s where Prince lives. Oh, I mean the
artist formerly known as Prince. Do you know the artist formerly known as Prince
has a child? What do they call it, “The baby formerly known as a
fetus.”?
ANNOUNCEMENT ANNOUCMENT ANNOUNCMENT - This is so
very exciting. The staff here at the Funny Farm has put together something very
special and I can hardly wait to share the news. But I will have to wait till
next issue. I feel like a celebrity making an announcement announcing a pending
announcement.
This issue has a load if information submitted by
one particular reader. I much appreciate his diligence in submitting material.
We have several letters about the WCA convention. I hope to hear from those
attending the COAI event this week.
That leads to your assignment: Review a clown
convention or event. Tell all the
Clown News Letter readers about the good educational event you attended. Write a
note about how the conventions were organized, who attended, who taught or the
subjects covered. Let your fellow clowns know if the return on your clown dollar
is worth the investment. Reviews from fellow clowns are my biggest influence on
convention decisions for future spending.
The next issue will be sent April
19, 2006
The Clown News Letter is made available free to you by the
FUNNY FARM
And is assembled by
Toby KID
966 H Ave. Ogden, IA 50212
Contents of Clown News Letter issue 387
1)
Special
Event
2)
WCA
Reviews
3)
Talent
Call
4)
501c3?
5)
Canadian
Update
6)
Canadian Clown
Seeks Clowns
7)
Juggling
Talent
8)
Clown -
History of Gay
9)
Fools for
Christ
10) Don’t Do
That
11) Clown
Exercises
12) SCAM
13) Clown News
Online
14) UPCOMING
EVNETS
15) ADVERTISERS
16) Quotes – Red
Skkelton
1) Special Event
from
Jewles: jewlsiyq@charermi.net
Presenting: Avner Eisenberg, AKA Avner The Eccentric, Work Shop
WORKSHOP FOR THEATER
PROFESSIONALS
September 23 & 24, 2006
FREEZE, FIGHT-OR-FLIGHT
A physical approach to acting and
comedy
Avner is one of the world's
leading teachers of physical comedy. He is on the permanent faculty of the
Celebration Barn Theater, Maine's International School for the Performing Arts.
He has taught Eccentric Performing and Clown workshops in the US, Switzerland,
France, Germany, Finland, Spain, Mexico, and Japan. Avner graduated from
University of Washington in 1971 and has been performing physical comedy
for over 30 years.
This intriguing workshop will give participants a firm
grounding in physical comedy techniques. For the working professional this is a
unique opportunity to take one’s work to the next level.
http://www.avnertheeccentric.com http://www.celebrationbarn.com
Workshop Schedule
September 23, 2006 Registration opens @
8:00
Saturday Workshop- limited to 25
$100.00 paid before June 1st $150 after
9:00 am – 12:30pm
12:30-3:00 Lunch Bring your own – delivery or visit one of the onsite restaurants – nap/rest
3:00pm - 6:00pm
Open Mic 8:00pm-?
Share your work! Especially important for Sunday attendees!
Sunday Advanced workshop limited to 14 must attend sat.
Creating and polishing
material
both days $200.00 Paid by June 1st $300 after
9:00-12:30
Lunch 12:30- 3:00pm
3:00-?
Friday night get acquainted improv games and balloon jam in Lobby!
Contact: Julie “Jewls” Wright 989-835-8237 jewlsiyq@chartermi.net Mail Reg form and Check to:
JULIE WRIGHT
AVNER WORKSHOP
628 E CHIPPEWA RIVER RD MIDLAND MI 48640
Valley Plaza Resort
Hotels & Convention Center
5217 Bay City
Rd.
Midland, Michigan
48642
1-989-496-2700
1-800-825-2700
For room reservation
Hotels & Convention Center
5217 Bay City
Rd.
Midland, Michigan
48642
1-989-496-2700
1-800-825-2700
Friday & Saturday $89.00 ea. If we fill a block of 10 $99. 00 ea. if not
Tell them your with the Avner the Eccentric workshop
Saturday limited to 25 entertainers
Sunday Advanced workshop limited to 14
call 989-835 8237 or email jewlsiyq@chartermi.net for availability
Saturday September 23, 06 Before June1,06 - $100 After June 1,06 - $125
Sunday limited to 14 entertainers
Sunday September 24, 06
Both days: Before June 1, 2006 - $200.00 After - $225.00
For Workshop Reservation Contact: Julie “Jewls” Wright 989-835-8237
2) WCA
Reviews
LOLLYFLOP@aol.com [mailto:LOLLYFLOP@aol.com]
I attended WCA and have to tell you it was a
great time. The theme was the 60's and we had hippies , go-go boots,
laugh-in look alikes, mini skirts, etc. We had a bet your bippy contest
where you had to describe exactly what your bippy was. Don't ask...I still
don't know. The competition was excellent this year (very professional)
especially the skits and paradability. There were a great number of people
competing is all categories. Many of the attendees went on to COAI.
I wish I was one of them but just couldn't do both. My compliments and
congrats to all of the officers who worked so hard to make this convention one
of the best...it showed!!!
Laurie Lolly Flop Heelein
Ann Guenther [mailto:pipsqueak@fea.net]
Hi Toby,
Thanks for the opportunity to share my thoughts about convention. I was disappointed in the schedule of classes. The two I was most interested in, Basic Face Painting and Basic Balloons were both held on Sunday before I had a chance to unpack my suitcase and supplies.
I loved Duane Laflin however they overloaded us with his classes while only allowing Harry Allen to give a class on Thursday, after I had purchased most items from other vendors. The second class they scheduled for Harry Allen took place two hours after the closing breakfast. I imagine it was not well attended.
The hotel was great, the food was good, the paratability competition had some great entrees. There was a lot to enjoy but I missed the classes I looked forward to, and the jams going on until midnight didn't appeal to me - heck, I'm going on Medicare in a few months and I've got to get my beauty rest.
Hugs,
Ann Guenther aka Princess Pipsqueak
2) Talent
Call
OPEN CALL AUDITIONS
FOR THE
BIGGEST TALENT SEARCH EVER
IN AMERICA!
Simon Cowell & The
Producers from AMERICAN IDOL team up with NBC in the
search for the hottest
variety & novelty acts from across the country in a
new talent
competition series!
"AMERICA'S GOT TALENT!"
Do you believe you are
the next big undiscovered talent in America?
Then audition at one of our
open calls for the chance at being Simon's next
big discovery!
Talents
of all kinds are invited to try out. Individuals and groups welcome.
Singers, dancers, animal acts, bizarre novelty acts, magicians,
comedians,
belly dancers....all ages...the sky's the limit!!
The series, which is
currently scheduled to premiere this summer, will
feature an array of hopeful
future stars as they compete for the chance to
win a gigantic $$$CASH$$$
FIRST GRAND PRIZE!
Please Note: To get on the VIP list for the auditions,
contact Stephanie
Pearlman, Talent Coordinator, at stephanie.talent@hotmail.com
Just let us know YOUR TALENT &
WHAT CITY you are coming to!
Also, let us know if you have an elaborate
set up, such as bands,
illusionists, animals...so we can give you time to set
up.
A photo ID is required in order to audition.
Applicants under the
age of 18 need to be accompanied by a parent or legal guardian and must have
parental permission.
Please come to the audition dressed in as much of your
costume as possible.
Candidates must be either a US citizen, legal permanent
resident of the US, or possess a current legal visa allowing you to seek
employment freely in
the US.
Animals: must have proper
immunization papers
Singers: prepare 2nd number
OPEN CALL
DATES-Doors open at 10 AM (some location address's TBA)
Thurs. April 6, Fri.
April 7, & Sat. April 8
Sheraton Los Angeles Downtown Hotel
711 South
Hope St. (south side of Wilshire)
LOS ANGELES, CA, 90017
Wed. April 12
& Thurs. April 13
CHICAGO, IL
Mon. April 17 & Tues. April
18
NEW YORK CITY, NY
Sat. April 22 & Sun. April 23
ATLANTA,
GA
4)
501c3?
Florabelle10@aol.com [mailto:Florabelle10@aol.com]
Hi Toby- You really got me with that "April Fool Joke",think my heart skipped a beat! Would like some information from any of the COAI orWCA alleys out there who have a 501c3,non-profit status. Please e-mail me directly at Florabelle10@aol.com, as I need some specific answers and don't know how to track down these alleys, and I know you are out there. Thanks-
5) Canadian
Clown
peabee_geevy <sharonja@direct.ca>
http://www.angelfire.com/hi5/cdnclowns/CAC.html
Have
updated the Clowns Across Canada website/national directory and, as usual, there
may be some glitches. Please drop by and check it out
and
if you see any errors give me a shout. New listings are always
welcomed!
Permission
to crosspost granted.
Sharon
"PeaBee Geevy"
in
BC
6)
Canadian Clown
Seeks Clowns
frank dracman [mailto:thatballoonguy@hotmail.com]
I have been receiving this newsletter for a long time now and have to my mind never seen any events in Canada. I live and work in a town of about 80000 and don't have a lot of interaction with other performers (there are no other PROFESSIONAL clowns here). I may be able to make some conventions in Canada but cannot in the US. Is there anything like that happening in Canada??
Paul "That Balloon Guy" Thompson
7) Juggling
Talents
Part
1
Mary Chisholm [mailto:chizzyclown@yahoo.com]
This is amazing and I thought you might like to include in newsletter to share with others who haven't seen. Let me know if the link doesn't come through because this is too good to miss.
Too Cool! Be sure to use
sound
http://www.sonnyradio.com/chrisbliss.htm
Mary "Chizzy" Chisholm
Part 2
Jason
Garfield is known for his attitude, and amazing juggling skill.
He
was obviously very jealous of all of the national attention Chris Bliss was
getting form his video so he wrote a letter slamming him and FINALLY DID A
PERFORMANCE PIECE HIMSELF!
Jason
is a juggling athlete juggling is a sport award winning juggler and this video
is amazing it's a shame he had to take showing up to get him to put a little art
and emotion into his sport.
The
result is an amazing 5 ball routine to someone else's applause.
(QuickTime)
Enjoy,
http://jasongarfield.com/pennradio.html
I
sent the Chris Bliss video a couple of weeks ago
http://www.chrisbliss.com/videopresskit.html
the
big finale
Chris
is not billed as a juggler he is billed as a comedian.
8) Clown – History of
Gay
Dean Gus McGee [mailto:deangmcgee@yahoo.com]
Korea's gay icons: A
king and his clown
International Herald Tribune
- France
... At the
core of the movie, which the producers hope to take to the United States, are
two male clowns, a masculine one named Jang Saeng and a feminine, delicate
...
http://www.iht.com/articles/2006/03/29/news/gay.php
This is a must read article for all clowns.
It is not that easy to negociate the site in order to consume the entire
article, but it is well worth the effort.
I would be interested (as I always am) to
hear your take on this issue.
D.G. McGee
9)
Fools for
Christ
Dean Gus McGee [mailto:deangmcgee@yahoo.com]
Here is interesting article for those of the Christian persuasion. A clown who does Clown Worships mailed the article to me. Someday I look forward to seeing him work and sitting down to a chat.
Fools for
Christ’s sake Kevin Seasolts OSB traces
the significance of the clown or the fool in Christian spiritual and cultural
perspectives. Invoking the visions of such artists as Fellini, Rouault and
Picasso, he reminds us that the only way to climb the ladder of holiness is to
climb down the ladder of humility.
In 1971 Federico Fellini, the distinguished Italian cinematographer, completed a provocative film which he called The Clowns. He searched out the practitioners of pre-cartoon art, the men who embodied the child’s nightmares, who mocked respectability with their crumpled tuxedos, who defied death itself with their prop hatchets and their cudgels and cannons. Fellini gloried in the grotesqueness of his clowns’ faces, the noses swollen like red balloons in parody of drunkenness, the sad eyes giving the lie to the garish smiles of the painted mouths, the harvest hair-dos and the eternally lifted brows.
But then with the freedom of genius, Fellini moved from the sawdust ring to the small provincial towns of Italy, each with its own pathetic clown – the saloon drunkard who acts out his one-man war-games before his amused bar-mates; the martinet station-master who moves like a machine and makes the trains all run on time, the buffoon police chief who even enforces salutes from little school children. With the same freedom Fellini moves into your life and mine – into the lives of all of us who sometimes take ourselves too seriously.
Wearing masks
Like the clown we spend much of our life playing
roles and wearing masks. We are afraid to be who we are, but in many ways we
really do not want to be what we pretend to be. So our little lives are often
pathetic pieces. Picasso and Rouault, whose oils helped set the pattern of much
of modern art’s preoccupation with the pathetic quality of our contemporary
human situation, often portrayed the human person as a clown. Smeared with
grease paint, motley men and women exhibit themselves before a faceless audience
in a circus that seems to have little meaning.
Magdalena Abakanowicz has captured the emptiness of human life in her sculpted textiles. When the Nazis invaded Poland in World War II, she saw drunken soldiers mutilate her mother’s body. It occurred to her then that the human body is like a piece of fabric – it can be torn apart so easily. She felt a great need to rage against the violence, the fear, the destructiveness and the tragedies of human life. As an adult artist, she chose to work in fabric as the best medium suited to serve her inspirations and inner yearnings.
Among her most challenging works is a mysterious series of ‘Backs’ – all different, though all alike. Eighty human backs without heads, without legs to their thighs, without hands to their arms. Most poignantly, the backs have no fronts or centres; they are hollow, each man hiding his own emptiness by crouching forward. They seem to groan in T.S. Eliot’s words, ‘We are the hollow men…’ Abakanowicz formed them from burlap and glue on the plaster cast of the back of a muscular male. Their isolation and yet their closeness, their emptiness and yet their potential for fullness of life, their individualism and yet their longing for community, all so sadly negated by their condition, cry out for rescue, for deliverance, for salvation, and for a new life of creativity, redemption, support, and sustenance.
Humanity, humour and humility
There are indeed intense yearnings in
the human heart – yearnings that God so longs to satisfy. When he was the abbot
of the Benedictine community at Ampleforth in England, Cardinal Basil Hume gave
a conference in which he set out three human qualities that he felt were
essential in the lives of Christians if they were to respond to God’s loving
initiative in seeking to satisfy the yearnings of the human heart. The qualities
were humanity, humour, and humility. All three words come from the Latin
humus – which means ‘earth.’ We Christians are men and women who are
meant to stay close to the earth. In keeping with the seventh chapter of
Benedict’s Rule, Basil Hume put special emphasis on humility. He knew well that
the only way to climb the ladder of holiness is to climb down the ladder of
humility. He also knew that the higher we climb the ladder of social success the
harder we fall when we are brought low by our own foibles and the foibles of
others. He knew well that sometimes the only way to humility is by way of
humiliations.
Our world, however, has little sympathy for the virtue of humility. It rather champions power, prestige, and praise. But we all know from experience that we are transformed as Christians not when we receive the accolades of praise, prestige, and power but rather when we experience our human diminishments and limitations. It is then that we become like beggars standing before the Lord with empty bowls in our hands. And in God’s good time and in God’s mysterious ways, God fills those bowls with God’s own gifts which not only bring us closer to God but closer to each other.
Broken vessels
Andre Dubus, who died several years ago, was a
distinguished American short story writer and essayist. A number of his
autobiographical essays have been published under the title Broken
Vessels. It is St Paul, of course, who long ago reminded us that we are
earthen vessels, sometimes cracked, sometimes broken. Dubus picked up that image
in the title of his book.
In the prime of his life he was the recipient of much praise, even received a prestigious MacArthur Fellowship in 1988, but then he lost his leg in an auto accident and even more tragically he lost his wife and two little girls through a painful marital breakdown. He learned humility through the very sad experience of humiliation. He came to understand that when we live in community, together with others, we will regularly disappoint and hurt one another because we are members of a broken body. He also came to realize the profound truth that we are brought together in Christian community by faith in the Lord Jesus, by Someone who is other and infinitely greater than we are. He simply acknowledged that we are desperately in need of a Saviour who will deliver us from our weakness and fears, from our suffering and disappointments, and who will deliver us into the hands of a loving God who empowers us to know, accept, and love ourselves and know, accept, and love one another – all in Jesus Christ and through the power of the Spirit. But the most awesome lesson he learned was that even though his heart was a broken vessel, he nonetheless was gifted with the mysterious presence of a loving and faithful God.
It was the regular celebration of the Eucharist that sustained him in the darkest of his days. He learned that if we are to be one with Christ in glory, we must first of all be one with Christ on the cross. The simple fact is that when we are humble and above all when we are humiliated, we often feel like fools, especially in our world today where we are expected to present ourselves as highly self-actualized individuals who have put all the pieces of our broken lives together.
Low tolerance of fools
In the eyes of the world, the person who is
truly Christian is regularly looked upon as a fool sometimes as a source of
contempt, ridicule and even sly laughter. Our world is not very tolerant of
fools; it does not suffer fools gladly – in the same way that our world is not
very tolerant of clowns. In fact the authentic clown is only possible in the
world of the Christian imagination, where there is a very solid and enduring
belief to sustain a double-vision of the world here and now and the world above
and beyond and hereafter. Humour, warm, kind, open-hearted, and hospitable, a
humour in which we can all share and be one in a burst of laughter, this humour
disappears in a one-level world, a so-called realistic world, from which dreams
have fled in the face of condescension and derision. Such a world has but one
reaction to embarrassment or human frailty – and that reaction is violence. Our
world is full of it – even in our so-called entertainment.
One night at the Medrano Circus in Paris, aerial artists risked their lives at every move. Meanwhile a clown sat on a drum in the middle of the ring and dreamily looked up in awe at the trapeze, his face smeared with white grease paint. In amazement he saw that the acrobats were literally taking their lives in their own hands. But then the music stopped. The master of ceremonies in formal evening clothes walked over to the clown and clouted him back to the real world with a loud bang. The crowd roared with laughter as two large tears appeared on the clown’s white face. But in his anguish he kept silent and still.
An unknown painter left the circus and hurried back to his studio. The image of the game of life and death played out in the air and the mockery of an innocent victim acted out below struck him with such force that the scene remained with him as a haunting experience for years to come. That night he painted the first of three hundred canvases portraying the figure of Christ as a white clown mocked by soldiers. The name of the clown was Grock, a classic name in the history of clowning. The painter’s name was Georges Rouault.
Playing the King’s Game
On the site of what some think to be
Pontius Pilate’s palace in Jerusalem, archeologists have uncovered the pavement
of an ancient courtyard. On the flagstones may be seen roughly engraved lines,
possibly those of a game that Roman soldiers played to while away the monotony
of their watches. It was commonly called the King’s Game because the winner
became a royal figure for the night. It has been suggested that Jesus was forced
to join his Roman guards in playing the King’s Game in the courtyard of Pilate’s
palace. He played the game and won. Hence he has appeared in iconography wearing
a crown of thorns and a crimson cloak.
Games, similar to the King’s Game, have been played for hundreds of years, especially at the time of the vernal and autumnal equinoxes. Reflecting on the custom, students of comparative religions and of depth psychology have shown how threats to human survival, such as storms which accompany changes in the seasons of the year, have often produced in men and women feelings of anxiety and threat. The human urge is to objectify and to exteriorize such forces, to play them out of the way, or to hurl them on the head of a scapegoat who will carry the evil into the wilderness.
That instinct survives down to our own day. It is reflected in the image of the fool in Shakespeare’s plays, in the king and queen of our Mardi Gras celebrations, in the white-faced clowns in our circuses, in the six million Jews annihilated in Hitler’s Europe, and in the poets and artists like Alexander Solzhenitsyn who portray the truth of the human situation and are banished in one way or another to the wilderness. The instinct is surely reflected in the racial and cultural aliens whom we hide behind our prison walls and other institutions.
Meaning of Christ’s suffering
When we attempt to analyze the
meaning of the suffering of Jesus as well as that of all the suffering in our
contemporary world, we find our theological reflections obscure and our biblical
reconstructions inadequate. Nevertheless the harsh realities of human life force
us to resonate with the suffering of Jesus. In spite of our fumbling efforts at
interpretation, the incongruity of an innocent victim rings true. The
white-faced clown playing the King’s Game in the procurator’s courtyard gives us
a glimpse of the meaning of faith as venture and risk. Christian faith summons
us to venture life itself and to surrender to the proclamation of God’s loving
kindness which brings us lasting life. The biblical faith of Christians is
concerned, not with the strengthening of an ailing human body which is then
deified, but rather with the mystery of healing transcendence and with the
miracle of people who surrender their whole existence to the Father of all life,
just as Jesus did. The clown in the King’s Game is far more than a model of
suffering endured and far more than a witness to the incongruities of human
existence. In the white face with the crown of thorns and the crimson cloak we
see the compassionate and forgiving face of our God.
The disciples of Jesus are men and women who are not resigned to the pathetic quality of human life. They choose to pass through painful tragedies as the port of entry to new life. In the midst of sickness and sadness, they proclaim that the kingdom of God is close at hand. In the midst of a security-conscious economy, they refuse to store up gold and silver; they do not worry about having a few coppers in their purse. They go out like gentle sheep among wolves; though they are cunning as serpents, they are harmless as doves.
Perhaps the reason why there is so little space for the clown in our society may be the same reason why there is so little space for Christ. He too was incognito, disguised in the flesh, a man of no reputation, despised and rejected, a man acquainted with sorrow and grief, a man of such countenance that no one thought him comely.
Death into resurrection
Fellini ends his film with a comic funeral.
The clowns are laying Auguste, the classic ragamuffin, to rest. But in the
breakdown of the ornate hearse, in the mock pieties accompanying the reading of
the will and the general insolence of the irreverent, capricious mourners,
Fellini transforms death into resurrection. He wants to repudiate the death of
clowning in our modern world. So he repudiates it, and like the clowns he
champions, he turns his face on death itself and embraces life.
Like Andre Dubus, we Christians find our greatest support and challenge in the celebration of the Eucharist. There we gather as the foolish people we are, but intentionally we gather to play a role and in a sense to put on masks. We pretend to be what we actually are and what we hope more and more to become. We hope to be truly the Body of Christ and so we put on Christ, believing that he embraced death and came to life again. We set out fragile vessels of bread and wine which when transformed become the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ. The holy bread is broken, the holy wine is poured out and shared. And in that sharing the Heart of the Lord Jesus speaks to our sometimes broken hearts. He says, ‘Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will refresh you.’
Only a fool would believe these things – but then it is only a wise person who can be a fool.
10) Don’t Do
That
Dean Gus McGee [mailto:deangmcgee@yahoo.com]
If what you are doing annoys the establishment, keep it up! The Christian Clown side of clowning truly opens the discussion door. I wonder what the different takes are within the various religions? What national religion promotes clowning it the church? Is any organized religion apposed? This article certainly takes a non-kind view of high jinks in church.
HI-CHURCH-JINKS
Are you kicking yourself because you missed that clown Eucharist (http://mcj.bloghorn.com/1689 “We are called to be “fools for Christ’s sake") that Trinity-Wall Street, one of the oldest and most historic Episcopal churches in the country, held last Sunday? Not to worry. The service bulletin is available here http://www.trinitywallstreet.org/video/05-22-05.pdf in PDF format. It starts out like this:
/The Ring Master,
Choir, Acolytes, and Clergy enter the Church./
Ring Master. Right. It goes downhill from here so you might want to bail out now. After a few preliminaries, the Old Testament lesson, Genesis
1:1-2:3 is read. Check that. Mimed, presumably by a Trinity parishioner. And I assume that means precisely what it says since /Living Church reports that "mime and sign language were the only means of communication until the conclusion "
I don't know what translation these people use and I don't want to know. Because according to the bulletin, the line from Genesis 1:2 which reads, "And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters" is here rendered "While a wind from God swept over the face of the waters." Anyway, they go right into the day's New Testament miming, Matthew 28:16-20 which is mimed by three people this time. I just hope that their invisible boxes were the right liturgical color.
Next, we are told that:
/The Ringmaster
directs the Sacred Ministers to the front of the altar./
Then come the Sermon, the Prayers of the People and the Peace. It doesn't go into detail here for which I am very grateful, actually. The sermon probably had something to do with clowns and Trinity will probably have it on their web site eventually. Check back with them in a week or so. After the Offertory:
/The alms, oblations
and other offerings of the People are presented.
The Celebrant blesses the gifts, the altar and the People. The People respond to the blessing with their noise makers./
Noise makers, huh? Didn't see that one coming. After the Great Thanksgiving and the Lord's Prayer, we get to the Breaking of the Bread.
/The Celebrant breaks the Bread. At the cue of the Ringmaster the People respond with noise makers./
Well, of course they do. Lord knows we can't have any dignity. After all, nothing proclaims honor, respect and veneration for the memorial instituted by Our Lord better than noisemakers.
Trinity calls the Retiring Procession:
/All sing the following hymn as the the Ministers of the Liturgy retire to the narthex. The People toss their streamers into the aisle./
Streamers? What, no confetti cannons? As Paul wrote the Corinthians:
/If, therefore, the whole church comes together and all speak in tongues, and outsiders or unbelievers enter, will they not say that you
are out of your minds/(1 Corinthians 14:23 )?
Want to be a /real/ fool for Christ? Tell that incredibly hot woman in the bar who's just made that /really/ interesting suggestion that you'd be delighted to sleep with her once the two of you got married. Tell your boyfriend that he'll get some after the wedding and not before. Leave the bachelor party when they slide in the porn.
Tell the guys that you're not going to stay out drinking until 3:30 AM because you really want to make Mass in the morning. Tell your friends that you're not going to see that new Tarantino flick everyone's talking about because you no longer find violence, murder, obscenity and profanity particularly entertaining. Tell the liberals in your family or your social circle that you won't be voting for the liberal candidate because he/she is pro-choice and you think that abortion is murder.
If any of your friends or family asks for an explanation for your behavior, give them the Reason and suggest that they might want to avail themselves of It. And then stand there while they laugh at you or call you a "holy roller," a "fundamentalist" or a "theocrat" and start going on about the "Christian right." Or be prepared to spend your weekends completely alone when they shun you entirely.
But you can't be a fool for Christ simply by declaring yourself one and troweling on the white face. So whatever you do, don't participate in self-indulgent tripe like clown eucharists. Because ridiculous displays like Trinity's impress nobody at all and do nothing to advance the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
11) Clown
Exercises
Dean Gus McGee [mailto:deangmcgee@yahoo.com]
Beat around the bush
Jump to conclusions
Climb the walls
Wade through the morning paper
Drag my heels
Push my luck
Make mountains
out of mole hills
Hit the nail on the head
Bend over backwards
Jump on the Band Wagon
Run around in circles
Advise the President on how to run the country
Toot my own horn
Pull out all the stops
Add fuel to the fire
Open a can of worms
Put my foot in my mouth
Start the ball rolling
Go over the edge
Pick up the pieces.
Kneel in prayer
Bow my head in thanksgiving
Uplift my hands in
praise
Hug someone and encourage them--
12)
SCAM
IF you get this email, it is a scam. Do not reply. Report it to your server. This is a scam.
Goodday,
How are you doing? I am Mr John Emily from London, am organising a
birthday party for my Son Timothy that is 12yrs old and the party will takes
place in my house in 9212 N.E. 10th Ave. Miami Shores FL 33138 and i got
to find your advertistment on the web,so i will like to know if you are still
available for 13th of may,2006.
Also I want to have the
price for the service for the date and you will take time for a good service cos
the party will start by 2.00 noon in the afternoon and ends up by 4.00pm in the
evening.So let me know the cost of the service ?
Also names to
be used on payment? So let me know the cost for the service and also advise me
back so that i can arrange in sending you a Money order as soon as we clearify
with exact cost. I await your email today.
Regards,
John
13) Clown News Online
A
smile and a cuppa for clowns
Northern Rivers Echo -
Lismore,New South Wales,Australia
Lismore-based clown doctors Dr Sniggles
and Dr Kerplunk (pictured) may be putting on a brave face, but lack of funding
is threatening to bring an untimely end ...
http://www.echonews.com/index.php?page=View%20Article&article=5462&issue=106
Evangelical
entertainers
Saugus Advertiser -
Beverly,MA,USA
Ned, a
licensed minister, and Joan, who holds a BA in elementary education, have been
in children's ministry for over 20 years. ...
http://www2.townonline.com/saugus/artsLifestyle/view.bg?articleid=455680
Local Woman
Shares Stories Of Clown Ministry Before Dying
Boone Mountain Times - NC,
USA
... “Then the word kinda
got out about what I did and people started calling. I don’t do pie in the face
clowns – what I do hits people where they live. ...
http://www.mountaintimes.com/mtweekly/2006/0323/clown.php3
Christian
clowns capture the heart and soul
DesMoinesRegister.com - Des
Moines,IA,USA
... That's why
the Christian clowns hope to draw a big crowd. ... "We're a little bit unique,"
she said. Consider a skit involving clowns trying to get to heaven.
...
http://desmoinesregister.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060323/NEWS08/603230366/1010
14) UPCOMING EVENTS
Check out http://www.clownevents.com/ for all clown
events.
Announce ALL your clown related single day or evening
workshops, alley meetings, jams, picnics or any others clown related events you
think may be of interest to others.
List your public performances or your travels so you
can meet other clowns.
^^^^^^
Michigan Magic
Day
Jewls [mailto:jewlsiyq@chartermi.net]
MICHIGAN MAGIC DAY
NEW PLACE A DATE
June 3, 2006
Valley Plaza Resort - Midland
web site
for location is www.valleyplazaresort.com
8:00-9:00 AM
Registration
9:00am Dealers Open - Stage competition
10:30 AM
Lecture
Noon Lunch
1:00 PM Close up contest
2:30 PM Dealers show
drawings, awards
4:00 PM Lecture
5:00 PM Shopping
6:00 PM Dealers Close
schedule subject to change
Contact Name: Jewls
Contact Email: jewlsiyq@chartermi.net
$60.00 includes evening show Evening public
show starts at 7:00pm
Tickets $10:00
^^^^^^
15
ADVERTISERS
Family Entertainers
Workshop
www.FamilyEntertainersWorkshop.com
Minneapolis, MN
August 24-26,
2006
This 3 day intensive event is located near the
famous Mall of America. Each day is dedicated to a specific area of clowning.
Day 1 is Hospital and Nursing Home Clowning. Day 2 is Birthday Party Performing
and Day 3 is The Caring Clown.
We have 7 awesome internationally known
performers and a fantastic schedule.
Please view the details at www.FamilyEntertainersWorkshop.com
See you there!
Steve "Salty" Kissell
(This ad runs through August
23, issue 398)
^^^^^^^^^^
Balloon And Magic
Mania
Norfolk, VA
May 5 and
6
Attention All Balloon
Twisters, Clowns and Magicians!
Balloon And Magic Mania will be hosting it's 9th annual convention in Norfolk, VA May 5 and 6. Please visit our website at www.BalloonAndMagicMania.com to see the schedule and check out the fun balloon competition with trophies! We have a special preday intensive training session featuring WILD TWISTING and SHOW CONTRUCTION. Our headliner for the weekend is Ralph the Great from Las Vegas! I will see you there!
(This ad runs through May 3,
issue 390)
^^^^^^^^^^
Clown Jam
Branson, Missouri
America's family entertainment
and live music capital is Branson, Missouri and it is calling you! That's right,
Clown Jam is there for another great year of fun and learning, located in the
beautiful Missouri Ozarks with great restaurants, outlet shopping, amusement
parks, and the best fishing in the country!
We have a great lineup for you
this year with fun competition and a great show. Bring your friends and family
and have a great vacation while you are all there! Please visit our site at www.ClownJam.com to register and get a copy
of the schedule. See you all there!
(This ad run through July 12,
issue 395)
^^^^^^^^^^
Celebrating Kentucky Clown
Derby 15th Anniversary!
www.KentuckyClownDerby.com
Come
join the fun this year with our exciting staff and lots of great vendors with
the latest & greatest in costumes and supplies!
We have a new style of
competition this year called the Red Nose Critique and it is designed to help
you become a better clown as you compete against only yourself. The judges are
there to help you improve not only you appearance but your performance as well.
Our featured speaker this year is that kidshow specialist Mr. Dave Risley! We
also have some exciting preday workshops of: Facepainting, Clown Ministry, The
Complete Children's Entertainer, and Be A Clown. This year, in response to your
requests we are having an extra day on Thursday with The Caring Clown. Please
visit our website for details. This year we have a two very special events
taking place during the evening show. One of them is celebrating the 50th
birthday of Steve Kissell and the other is a real BIG surprise. Please stop by
at www.KentuckyClownDerby.com
and see the schedule and to register, see you there!
Steve
Kissell
director
(This ad runs through
September 20, issue 400)
^^^^^^^^^^
ClownfestTM 2006
25th
Anniversary Edition
www.Clownfest.com
Seaside Heights, New
Jersey
September 13 to 17,
2006
"Come with anticipation...
leave with inspiration!"
Clownfest has something for the very
novice clown to the seasoned professional. Clownfest has special lectures and
boardwalk events. Clowns are sure to take away some great new skills and ideas.
Our schedule has a prestigious list of trainers to enhance any
clowning experience. Clownfest is designed for FUN too.
No
other clown event has a big clown parade and so many activities that put clown
artists out in front of so many spectators. Lot's of FUN and lot's of education,
an "edu-vention"! We coined the phrase and we live by
it.
"Have FUN, Be FUN!"
Clowns take part in great classes and workshops all week long. See twenty-one clown dealers too. On Wednesday attend special Pre-Day training. Next, Clownfest has wacky events where clowns and spectators get a chance to meet one on one on the weekend.
Twenty-five prizes have been added to make each clown event extra special. Any fully registered clown can win one of the many prizes or the $500.00 cash prize. Clown names will be randomly drawn at each event location. To qualify you must participate
in make-up and costume to win.
"Clown Balloon Express"
On Saturday here's your chance to make your neatest balloon creations for the public. Prizes!
"Family FUN
Frolic"
On Saturday folks on the boardwalk
will have more FUN as they frolic with safe family games. Clowns will be
doing parachute games,
beach balls, hoola-hoops and stickers.
Prizes!
"Clownfest Passport To FUN"
On Saturday clowns
stroll and visit ten arcades along the boardwalk. Get the "Passport" stamped
along the way andafter the parade on Sunday one "Passport" will be selected to
win $500. cash!
"Kazoo Band"
On Saturday clowns strut their stuff
as they band together down the boardwalk in the "Clownfest Kazoo Band".
Prizes!
"Clown Facepainting Demo"
On Saturday clowns bring paints,
brushes and some fun ideas to paint on happy faces. Prizes!
"Clown Stage Shows"
On Saturday see live clown
performances. Hear the big brass sound of the Funny Factory Clown Band Show
too!
"Disco Party"
On Saturday break out the Afros,
platform shoes and plan to boogie. Fun food, a Disco DJ, 50/50, Raffle,
Prizes and Awards.
"Anniversary Fireworks"
On Saturday night Clownfest will have
a spectacular
celebration fireworks display on the
beach!
"Clown Competitions"
On Sunday- Costume, Make-up and
Paradebility competitions.
Whiteface, Auguste and
Character. Trophies!
"Clownfest On Parade"
On Sunday afternoon the "Clownfest
Clown Parade" with bands all marching on the boardwalk. Thousands of spectators
will be on hand. FREE BONUS Group photo on Sunday after the
parade.
Trophies & Prizes!
THERE IS ONLY ONE
CLOWNFEST!
There isn't anything like it in the
world.
AZTEC OCEAN
RESORT
901
BOARDWALK, SEASIDE HEIGHTS, NJ 08751
Call...
732-793-3000
Special "Clownfest" package rates for multiple days
are available.
Accommodations at the Aztec are limited so ask to be
directed
to other
lodging once this motel is filled. Inexpensive after-season room
rates.
For more information email to: Clownfest@aol.com
or mail your request
to:
"Clownfest"
c/o 240 swimming River Road
#C
Colts Neck, NJ
07722-1528
Clownfest is the registered trademark
of the
National Clown Arts Project,
Inc.
For more info email: Clownfest@aol.com
(This
ad runs through September 6, issue 399)
^^^^^^^^^^
www.clownevents.com - The website with (almost) every clown event. We have over 300 events already for 2006, with more events being added every week. So, take some time and check out the events listed. And with our new home page displaying events in your region, it will not take long to check out events in your area.
Steve Finch
Editor
ClownEvents.com
We are a hand-reviewed calendar of Clown Events. Most of our events are the educational events, but we have non-educational Clown Events such as the National Clown Week and April Foolery.
We add new events every week to the Calendar. And then we index the information, so that you can find 9 different ways. Send me an email if you can think of a tenth way
· Regional Calendars – three regional Calendars for Clown Events in a geographic regions
· Subject Calendar – Several subject Calendars (subjects such Balloon, Magic, Puppetry, Juggling)
· Year long list – a list of all the events for that year (2004, 2005, 2006, 2007)
· 60 days – a list of events in the next 60 days
· New Events - a list of the latest 25 events added to clownevents.com
· All Events – a list of all of the events in the calendars
· Previous Events – a list of events from last year
· Clown Schools – a list of 30 Clown Schools from around the world.
· Locate by State – A map where you click on a state and see the events located in that state
As we started to add all of the events, that we found, our single calendar over-loaded. So we have split the single calendar, up into multiple calendars. And then we added some events that are not strictly Clown Events, but are ones that a Clown would want to know about. Such as Puppet festivals, Magic workshops or Balloon jams.
If you do balloon art, you should check out the Balloon Events calendar. Or if you want learn about magic, check out the Magic Event calendar. And for more information on Clown Events, checkout the three regional Clown Events
calendars.
But if you still want to see all of the events check out the 2005 Events List web page, it has every event for 2005, we know about - From National Clown Week to Twist & Shout to the COAI Convention (and lot's in between).
Or search our www.clownevents.com to find an event for you.
Steve
Editor
ClownEvents.com
P.S. You should think about attending one of the clown workshops or clown schools in Europe. You should consider locations other than the UK, since English is the working language for several courses that are not in the UK.
Airline fares to Europe are cheaper in the fall and spring, than in the summer. This could be a nice tax deduction for your Clown Business. And you would be a better clown.
(This ad runs through July 26, 2006 issue
396)
^^^^^^^^^^
16) Quotes from Red
Skelton
"God's children and their happiness are my reasons for being"
"I don't want to be called 'the greatest' or 'one of the greatest'; let other guys claim to be the best. I just want to be known as a clown because to me that's the height of my profession. It means you can do everything-sing, dance, and above all, make people laugh."
"Today's comics use four-letter words as a shortcut to thinking. They're shooting for that big laugh and it becomes a panic thing, using four-letter words to shock people."
"Mom used to say I didn't run away from home my destiny just caught up with me at an early age."
Reflecting on his life: "I'd have avoided some of the pain if I could. Anyone would. But I wouldn't have missed knowing any of the people -- even the ones whose leaving hurt most. In fact, the only thing I'm sorry about is that I didn't meet one particular guy, a clown named Joe Skelton. You know, he sure picked the right profession. I mean, a clown's got it all. He never has to hold back: He can do as he pleases. The mouth and the eyes are painted on. So if you wanta cry, you can go right ahead. The make up won't smear. You'll still be smiling. . . ."
"All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. " (from "1,911 Best Things Anybody Ever Said," )
About Freddy the Freeloader: “I get asked all the time; Where did you get the
idea for Freddie the Freeloader, and who is Freddie really?
Well, I guess you
might say that Freddie the Freeloader is a little bit of you, and a little bit
of me, a little bit of all of us, you know.
He’s found out what love means.
He knows the value of time. He knows that time is a glutton. We say we don't
have time to do this or do that. There's plenty of time. The trick is to apply
it. The greatest disease in the world today is procrastination.
And Freddie
knows about all these things. And so do you.
He doesn't ask anybody to
provide for him, because it would be taken away from you. He doesn't ask for
equal rights if it’s going to give up some of yours.
And he knows one thing
... that patriotism is more powerful than guns.
He’s nice to everybody
because he was taught that man is made in God’s image. He’s never met God in
person and the next fella just might be him.
I would say that Freddie is a
little bit of all of us.”
"I only come to life when there are people watching."
"I'm nuts and I know it. But so long as I make 'em laugh, they ain't going to lock me up. "
"Our principles are the springs of our actions. Our actions, the springs of our happiness or misery. Too much care, therefore, cannot be taken in forming our principles."
"His death was the first time that Ed Wynn ever made anyone sad."
"No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds."
"I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God."
"Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations."
^^^^^^^^^^
Click here if you have anything to add: clownnewsletter@tobykid.com
Hope to hear from you all real soon.
Next Clown Newsletter to be sent Wednesday night, April 19, 2006.
The Clown Newsletter
By the Funny Farm
Toby KID
966 H Ave.
Ogden, IA 50212
515/275-3250
==========
The
End